Let's Add A Year...

With all that has been going on with AJ, I don't want you to think Gordy is getting ignored.  He is not.  He is my little shadow and spends most waking hours within 5-10 feet of me.  He is such a funny mass of contradictions that I find something new to be amazed about every single day.

His personality is the type that he is funny without trying to be.  He has a natural dry wit and has an opinion on just about everything.  Right now he has an obsession with video games that we are trying to rein in.  Not that video games are bad, but he spends way too much time asking to play them.

He also has a very explosive temper.  Always has.  The day after he was born the nurse had to wake him up to change his diaper and check his vitals.  He stiffened his entire body and let out the loudest scream I had ever heard a newborn emit.  The nurse looked at me and said "He has a temper, this one.  You are in for it now."

What his temper means in connection with his video game obsession is that when we tell him no he throws a tantrum.  That is actually his typical response to all negative answers.  Again, trying to break him of this habit, but it is a LONG row to hoe.

The real looming task right now is the issue of school.  Gordy will be five years old in September.  Typically, this means we should be getting ready for Kindergarten.  Not so fast!  Oregon has a registration cut off date of September 10th for Kindergarten and 1st Grade.  That means all Kindergarteners must be 5, and all 1st Graders must be 6, on or before September 10th of the corresponding school year.  Guess whose birthday is September 15th?

That's right, Gordy has to wait another year to start Kindergarten.  At first I was furious.  He is already taller than half of the current 1st Graders (in AJ's class).  He was already going to be the tallest kid in class, now we are going to add another year?  I researched every alternative and kept coming up against a wall.  Oregon is pretty solid on their cut offs.  The only exception would be if he started Kindergarten in California, then I could get a waiver half way through the school year.  As much as I love my family in Eureka, I just couldn't see Gordy living down there for 6 months just to get a waiver to start Kindergarten a year early.  It just wasn't worth it.

I was resigned to the idea of him being a 6 year old Kindergartener, when I started volunteering in AJ's class twice a week.  There is a boy in AJ's class whose birthday is a week after Gordy's, and he is the youngest in class.  His family moved from California half-way through Kindergarten.  Observing him interact with the other students forced me to stop and reassess my opinion.  He is super bright; one of the top students in class.  He is also super immature and a distraction to all of the other students in class.

After seeing this I started talking (and listening) to several people whom I trust that might have solid, educated opinions on the matter.  My best friend (a teacher), whose birthday is the day after Gordy's and was the youngest in many of her classes;  The school secretary, whose son also has a September birthday; and my husband, whose parents started him in a private school at the age of 4.  All of them were unanimous in their chorus of "hold him back".

"Boys mature later than girls."

"They can handle being the oldest one in class far better than being the youngest one."

"Mentally, they are simply not ready to contemplate sitting still for that long.  Boys just seem to have more energy."

It was the last advice that caught me.  I'm not sure if it is true for all boys, but it is certainly true for Gordy.  So after a long discussion and a reworking of the budget we opted to put Gordy in two days of pre-school in the Fall.  This makes the most sense for us, as I am already at the school two days a week, and Gordy really does want to go to school.  He is just simply not ready for Kindergarten.

Calming Jars

I have a confession...I am the mother of wild children.  Okay, this might not be that huge of a confession.  In fact, it isn't really much of a secret.  All of my friends and family know about my boys' dispositions.  They are not bad children, just extremely passionate about everything they do.  This often leads to over wrought nerves and REALLY BIG tantrums.

My husband and I have tried all sorts of disciplinary tactics.  Some work, others don't, but none of them really reached the heart of the matter...the boys need to CALM DOWN!  Have you every tried to discipline an hysterical child?  Are they really learning anything?

Yesterday a friend of mine posted on Facebook that she had made her daughter, who is a year older than my youngest son, a Calming Jar.  In the post someone asked her what it was and she explained.  To me, a nerve-frayed mother looking for a solution, this was pure GOLD!  I looked up the directions on Pinterest (my current addiction) and informed my sons we were going on an "Inspiration Expedition" to the craft stores.

These are all of the supplies you need (water too).  Seriously, all you need is a bottle or jar (12-16 oz), water, glitter glue, extra fine glitter, food coloring, and duct tape (or something else to seal the cap of the container nice and tight).

I chose to use a 12 oz soda bottle because they were plastic and on sale.  I, of course, had to make a great sacrifice by drinking a couple of these babies to get my empty bottles, but what can I say, I am a slave to my art.

After the bottle was emptied and rinsed I filled it with 12 oz of water.

My son then was able to help by emptying two tubes (about 1 1/2 Tbsp) of glitter glue into the bottle.  Glitter glue (found in the kids craft section of your local craft store) is necessary, as other glues are not thick enough to achieve the desired effect of this project.

Next he added his preferred food coloring to the bottle.

Next I helped him add 1/2 an ounce of extra fine glitter.  The heavier glitter sinks to the bottom too fast for the purpose of this project.

Next I capped the bottle, shook it until all of the glitter and glue were mixed evenly and the glitter swirled around in a "storm-like" fashion.  At this point I sealed the cap.  I used black designer Duck Tape because I thought it added a nice touch to the project and was a lot less messy than using super glue or rubber cement.

Then I gave the bottle to my son and told him to shake it up as good as he could and then watch it until all of the glitter stopped moving.  I timed the bottle while he was doing this.  His bottle took about 3 minutes to settle.  The desired time is 3-5 minutes.

The purpose of this bottle is for the child to imagine that the glitter in the bottle are all of his thoughts.  As the glitter settles so do his thoughts.  After the bottle is settled then he should be ready to speak with you about what happened, or what's bothering him, or why he did what he did.

This purpose is easier to achieve with an older child, but my 2-year old is mesmerized by the glitter and usually stops crying long enough to shake the bottle and stare at it.